How many times have you told yourself or another person, “I need to think about it” or “let’s see how I feel?” If you are anything like me, it’s been a lot if you’ve been alive for at least 20 years. These are the words that doom every potential goal we have ever set out to achieve. These phrases seem so innocent, as though we are honoring ourselves and the world by going inside and consulting with our inner selves before going ahead and doing something. But, let me tell you right now, they are our one way ticket to staying comfortable, safe, and sabotaging anything we really want to achieve.
I’m going to do an exercise with you to prove my point. Go ahead and think about the elements in life that you’ve made work and at which you’ve been successful. If you can’t think of any I will give you a few examples: raising kids, your marriage, or your career. If you’ve been successful at any of these, and we will define success as: your kids still being alive and well, a marriage as having remained faithful and come home when you say you’ll be home without engaging in an affair. And for your career: having kept a job for a period of time that you had desired and continued to keep the jobs that you have intended to keep.
I want you to think about whichever example you’ve chosen and ask yourself how many times you have told your kids “I need to think about it” or “I’ll see how I feel” when it comes to feeding them or picking them up from school. How many times have you asked these questions to yourself regarding marriage? How about your work life?
I have no doubt that your mind has told you an innumerable amount of times that it didn’t feel like prepping a meal for your kids or going to pick them up. We may have felt a desire not to be faithful in our marriages and perhaps not to come home when we said we would. And without a shadow of a doubt we could all agree on the fact that there have been many times when we didn’t feel like showing up to work.
However, ultimately when the “I don’t feel like it” thoughts appeared or the feelings of dread came up we dismissed them. We may have been in a mood for a spell, but we didn’t entertain them to the point of letting them make our decision. We have decided in advance that no matter what we will nurture or show up for our children, our marriages, and our jobs, even when we don’t “feel like it.”
Yet, when we have a weight loss goal and chose the protocol we are going to implement to lose the weight most of us show up differently. We may at first take the approach that I’m doing this no matter what and odds are likely that we see some results initially. But then we start consulting how we think or feel when it comes to following the food plan. And, guess what happens from there? We start obeying our thoughts and our feelings and we sabotage ourselves.
My advice? Treat this endeavor like you do your kids, your marriage, and your job. Plan what you will eat in advance each day. Follow it to the tee. WHEN the thoughts of not feeling like following it come up (and they will), notice them and remind yourself of your commitment as you do your other endeavors at which you’ve been successful.
The worst idea if you want to succeed at anything in life is to consult with your thoughts and feelings. Let me save you the time and energy and tell you what your mind will tell you about following whatever food protocol you’ve chosen. It’s ALWAYS going to tell you that it would rather your favorite foods than the protocol you’ve chosen and you can start again on Monday (or some variation of that). It’s NEVER going to feel like following it if you’ve at all struggled with your weight or have had a love affair with food.
If you master this, you will undoubtedly reach your weight goal and have no problem with maintenance. I will address the question everyone is anxious to know, “what should I eat to lose weight?” in a future blog.
I used to struggle with my weight and never thought I’d be free of the struggle. I promised myself if I figured this out I would share it with the world. Your “right size body” and free from weight/food struggle self is awaiting you. Please allow me the honor of meeting with you in a complimentary discovery session by clicking this link: https://calendly.com/bestversion76/60min.
Jennifer Oney Coaching 